Disclaimer: This is my blog - so feel free to fuck right off if you don't like it. I'm trying to heal my own emotional traumas and wounds - I apologize in advance if you don't like how my memories and feelings make you feel - but thats on you. That's on you to heal ;)
Thanks for reading!
I honestly didn't think I'd hear from this guy again. I really didn't want to though either. A few months ago, a coworker of mine at a restaurant I work at very part time, came up to me and said, your ex asked my brother to hook him up with me.
I was like, "kool".
My step brother told me a few month back that he had reached out to him and they hung out one night and all he could do was talk about me.
Turns out, this guy got evicted from his apartment and moved in with what he described to me as his "crazy ex". He had went back to her after I broke up with him the first time and then lied about it. LMAO
The whole time, still messaging me wanting me back. Just lying through his fucking teeth.. It's disgusting to me. Like I didn't know who she was? Like I couldn't look at her dumpster fire of a life through her facebook page.. Where she overshared her thoughts. Not relatable memes jabbing at the current actions of your boyfriend. But one half sentence thoughts, like, "I'm so frustrated" or "I'm depressed". I mean, don't just post that and not respond to any comments detailing your situation further. It's like you're goating people to inquire and then don't respond or you respond via dm.. I couldn't figure out what tf was going on between you two.
I mean, come on.. He must think we're both dumb as hell at this point. lmao Just because he didn't allow tags on his profile page doesn't mean it wasn't on hers. His relationship status was public as single and hers was hidden completely.
I should have just went to her directly the first time, but honestly, I didn't care enough. I was repelled.. And I wouldn't be able to help her either. I think she even blocked me at one point for some reason.
I literally did nothing wrong and she probably wouldn't have listen at the time anyway; but I can't tell anybody anything and I sure as fuck was gonna go backwards over this situation.
I was just like, how you really gonna sit here and hang out and talk to that girl while still messaging me to get back with me. I saw him very briefly during that but the fact that he just up and ghosted that girl when we did..
Or did he? LMAO
SIX MONTHS LATER....
Here I am minding my own business at work one day six fucking months later and I get an email.
This mfer straight up sent me a $10 Starbucks gift card!
I was like W.T.F dude.
Just having been catfished by Kevin, the week before, I had had enough of this fucking dramatic ass bullshit. Like the gd audacity at this point! Who the fuck do you medium ugly dumpster fire men think you are!?
To be honest, I was fucking fuming.. Like oh hell fucking no.. Not today Satan!
I wasn't mad for me. I was mad for those unhealed women that are being hurt by these man children. I was mad that these men out here think they can just take our love, our kindness, our patience and compassion and drain it from us until there is absolutely nothing fucking left to give.
Gone are those fucking days, ladies.. I'm telling ya'll right now.
So, I sat there.. and I thought about it. Because, well this me, doesn't react to much anymore these days.. I've made it my practice to respond only when I have been able to process it to a point of a collected response. I mean, lmao, most of the time anyway. lolol I have found that most of the time, the other person usually has not adapt the same practice yet. More of then than not I find myself in escalations one sided discussions where, in the end, nothing gets resolved and more resentment and animosity is created.
LMAO I said we're healing hoe, not healed lmao. I'm not perfect and I'm not Gandhi.. I'm just me. So unsubscribe if you fn want. I'm following my dreams.. What are you doing with your life?
Ok lol of course, coming back to point.
Finally, after a some moments of processing. I pick up my phone and I get on Facebook. I search up his new/old girlfriend. You know, the one I was just talking about above. From what I've gathered, I assume he's living with her at this point. And she is tagging him in a lot of her posts. I was looking for a phone number.. I didn't want to risk my message getting lost in her spam folder via email or messenger. All I know is that this dude is being tagged in her posts as early as that past weekend and he's over here sending me fucking starbucks. smh
He's over here helping her with her smoke meats business and trying to hook up with other people. I'm not trying to play these games with these man children.
Then it came to me.. lolol her smoked meat business. I found that page, found the phone number, sent her a picture of the email, I introduced myself as his ex girlfriend and said, "I don't know whats going on between you two and Idc. I just thought you should know he's over here sending me starbucks. I'm gonna redeem tho. Have a great day!"
She never responded to that message and that's completely okay. I did what I needed to do. I would have wanted to know. I think everyone would just really want to know.
Someone actually did that for me once.. lol only once and it was a complete stranger. Regardless, that stranger was being the change she wanted to see.
As I type this now, I'd say that stranger inspired me to do the same (heart emoji).
Okay, closing this little chapter now. He messaged me a little while later and said something I don't remember. I remember telling him that I told his girlfriend what he had done and I that I seriously truly wanted nothing to do with him.
Responded with some long ass comment about being sorry and how I was everything.
Very big differences between me and this guy, I know I'm everything - with or without a man.
It's time to get on my level or go home. lol js I gotta find me a man that loves themselves as much as I love myself. I'm looking tho.. What's meant for me will find me.. in this lifetime or another.
Comments